Cheryl’s Journals

working life is tiring. at times u will become too busy for the wholeday
that your brain dont even hav time to take a rest. The mind just keep generating
what is coming up next, where next, when next, which next, who next…everythg seemed to be endless.the body is weary and the mind felt there are tonnes of brick tumbling down ur head.
it reached up to the point the physical body is totally drain off. The battery is at the most lowest signal.
The kinda burden which will make u feel breathless. sometimes i would end up sitting down on my office chair with an empty brain, starring at my students’ artwork hoping to relief my mind through the admiration of artistic value.
but you cant seem to think properly and effectively. everythg felt so numb. senseless.
meaningless. my heart is aching again. then i know that my body has overworked. I needed to take medication from my physician but havent really had the time to do so.
My daily routine is al focusing on teaching, church activity, home, tv, pc and my slumber bed.
I am so tired..without realizing i would fall into the trap of envy again, comparing myself with the ppl ard me, be it colleagues or students. I knew it is my main weakness that i would start admiring other ppl the blessings and relationships that they have while i dint have all these. A hubby who could lend his shoulder for you to lean against whenever you needed him, ur own children to hug & embrace, a brandnew car to driv along, a healthy body with good stamina, a peking puppy to pamper with, an aircond house to stay in, and many other things…
Before I fall even deeper of accumulating all these insufficiency in my life, God’s voice silently speaks to me again as i glanced at the ‘post-it’ note that I sticked at my frontdesk.
Written as such, " Lions may grow hungry & tired, BUT those who seek after the LORD lack no good thing."
Indeed I was very encouraged by His reminder in the book of psalms. Although I know my condition may not seem to be what i expected, as wonderful as it can be BUT i know God is watching over me and I have all i wanted in HIM.
His voice is telling me not to focus on my disabilities but instead I should treasure and learn to appreciate what He has given me now. I should realise that whatever is happening in my life now is allowed by HIM otherwise nothing will happen by chance. And then i remember what NICK VUJICIC has ever preached in his word, a remarkable story of some1 without limbs.
He clarifies as such:
‘I take my foot for granted, my family and the fact that I wasn’t born in a third world country all blessings that God had freely given and I still complain? I came across;

Romans 8:28 - "And we know that in all things God works for the best for those who love Him."

That verse spoke to my heart and convicted me to the point where that I know that there is no such thing as luck,
chance or coincidence that these "bad" things happen in our life. In;

James 1:3&4 - "…know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so
that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything."

I am so touched by his determination and the optimistic mind he has. Indeed I am motivated eachtime I read his article.
I am now anticipating NICK’s coming to KUCHING…nextyr in MARCH most probably 2007. I belief it is going to be BIG and outreaching! praise God… ^_^

~ by cheryl82 on September 29, 2006.